The Dangers of the Zoo

(My MSPaint is being really silly so I've had to quickly doodle my pictures... I'll come back and fix them later:D)


A little while ago, I was very kindly invited to spend a fun-filled day at the zoo with my family, woo!
I agreed to go, and got up RIDICULOUSLY EARLY in order to travel for 2 hours in a car with 3 kids, 2 teenagers and 2 overworked adults.



(I wasn't very excited)
And my little cousin Ben decided he was going to be carsick IN the car, which was really very unpleasant and didn't set the trip off to a particularly good start... But once we got there, it started to be a much better day!

I saw some ducklings

and a cute little tiger

and a pig dribbled on me...


But the WORST part of thw whole day was when I was casually minding my own business, turning a corner when BAM!!!
There's a menacing looking sloth just dangling in front of me and I swear to God I have never run so fast in my life. My sister thought it was really funny, but I disagreed...
(That doodle is pretty much a photograph by the way, even with the blood, speech bubble and scary black aura)

Now may be a good time to mention that I have a terrible sloth phobia.

They're horrible.
Also, don't ask where the phobia came from because I honestly couldn't tell you, haha!
#mysterious

Conclusion:
SLOTHS SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED IN ZOOS!
Or at least put a warning up or something, tchhhhh

Kids, ey?

I have a little 12 year old brother called Alex, and I love him, so if I get the chance, I like to take him nice places:D
So this week I offered to take him to the cinema to see whatever he wanted to see, which I thought was a bit brave, but I like presenting myself with challenges..
The first challeneg was that he took literally 3 days to decide between the five 12a's showing at the cinema, then finally chose the one film I knew nothing about.
~~Battle Los Angeles~~
Alex told me it was:


That doesn't necessarily sound quite as exciting to a 19 year old female, but I thought "sure why not?"

The second challenge was that Alex sneakily managed to convince me at the very last second that it would be a good idea to bring his friend along..

The third challeneg was that I was on my own for the whole ordeal. I'd desperately tried to convince my sister to come along to help me on my plight, but she's not the biggest fan of going to the cinema to see films she doesn't want to see with two hyperactive children.... and she refused in quite a convincing way...


Haha, don't worry, although she was assertive, she didn't actually set herself on fire or anything, that would be a tad extreeeeme...

ANYWAY.
I took the two crazy boys to the cinema and it was a brilliant film!


(This is an almost exact summary of the plot by the way)

And the fourth and final challenge was making them both decide what they wanted for tea. EVENTUALLY, after a million decision changes and constant nagging from Alex's favourite older sister;), they decided they wanted a chinese takeaway (which my sister very kindly paid for as a way of apologising for deserting me earlier). Win!
Though all they wanted were noodles, chips and rice.
...

Kids, ey?

Revision activities.

It happens 3 times a year (stupid University term system), and everytime I treat it like I don't know it's coming.

"Oo, I'll just laze around the house doing nothing till Week 9, yaaay- OH WAIT!?"

So, I've had to do a little bit of crazy revision the past few days, but I've enjoyed several different kinds of revision breaks....

ACTIVITY#1

ACTIVITY#2



ACTIVITY#3


ACTIVITY#4



ACTIVITY#5


The exams went really well by the way;)

Quote blog!

"Gandhi is in my bed.. Surrounded by chickens" - Sam



"I had a lovely birth............................... day" - Jen's Nan

".. impromptu sex."
"Or dirty liasons."
"..Aren't they the same thing?" - Hannah and I



"some people r hot" - the intellect that is Jen



"I'm going to go home and boil a cabbage!" - Emma


"LOS LOCOS IS CLOSED!" - Random bizarre-o in the Ziggys queue



"I think Count Dooku just flipped me off" - Matthew


"..... we had absinthe?" - Jen

"heilan' coo" - Amy speaking scottish

Interpretive Imagery

I say Sir, how do you do?

My least favourite fruit

The dreaded pear.

We don't get on.
They're dry and bland and the texture of them in my mouth makes my tongue hate me. The only thing they're good for is ruining fruit trifles and salads, and they're basically just like reject apples. I have a seriously great distaste for these bad boys, but today I found out that I am one.
That's right, ladies and gentlemen, I have discovered that I am a pear.

Poor pear.
But yes! I have measured my waist-hip ratio and not only discovered that I have the exact same ratio as Marilyn Monroe (oh yeah.) but also that I'm a pear shape.
Though as good as that sounds, all it means is that I have a bit of an arse and a modest bust, but a pretty dashing waist.
Yay..?
I don't understand why we need labels for female body shapes, nevermind the amount of labels that we actually do have! I had to wade through an abundance of fruits before being able to read what health risks I carry by simply having weight spread around my hips. It's ridiculous!
You can be an apple, pear, carrot, column, spoon, banana, hourglass, bell, and my persnoal favourite, a butternut squash...?!!?!
Surely a woman's a woman, regardless of how well her body resembles a fruit?
Also, I'd rather be something that people don't eat.


I'll be on edge for the rest of my life now.

The day I went deaf.

Okay, admittedly the title of this blog post may be slightly more of a metaphor than it seems to be. Partially because I'm not deaf, and haven't ever been deaf, and partially because it's not even really about me at all!

This blog post is about my poor 3 year old headphones, as the one named R has suffered a slight malfunction today and subsequently poor L is now an only child.
And it completely wasn't my fault at all! (Just to make that clear). All I did was sit down and possibly snag the wire a teeny tiny little bit. Then R started making silly hissing noises so I played with the wire a bit and then R stopped making any noise at all...

L was devastated and sank into a deep state of headphone-depression which meant he couldn't continue to full capacity and I had to put him into a retirement home for his own good.
My iPod however, boldly carried on and then ran out of battery without me realising.........

And if you don't feel sorry for my poor headphones because they're inanimate objects blahblahblah, instead, just imagine the situation on the train as this is all happening:


Very sad indeed!
(and check out the angry birds on my phone;D)

ANYWAY.
The consequence of all this is that I've had to adopt some new baby ones that'll hopefully arrive within 1-2 business days:)
Meet the new L-R team!

THEY'RE PURPLE:D